Worry ... A Better Way

“Don’t Worry” … I’m not going to tell you not to worry. I am going to tell you about a better way to worry that is less stressful and less harmful to your mind and body. But first,

What is worry?

Worry is mental distress or agitation resulting from concern, usually concern about something in the future. It is that needless, almost endless, annoying rumination about potential negative events. Worry is not analyzing or planning or problem solving, all of which have a goal and an end to the process.

Worry, for example, is ruminating about all the negative things that could happen if another economic depression occurred. You think about all the bad things that might happen to you and your family, and then you go back through them again and again and again. You tell yourself that you might lose your job and you feel fear, but you do not plan for what you would need to do to find another job, like updating your resume, polishing your interviewing skills, and searching for available jobs now.

You might imagine being forced out of your home and living in your car and how terrible that would feel, but you do not make a list of the essentials you would need to survive in your car, things like blankets in the winter or a battery operated fan in the summer or restroom and bathing arrangements.

And, after you go through all the potential bad things in your head, you then go back through them again and add new thoughts that did not occur to you the last time.

There is no end to this ruminating… it just goes on and on, until the actual event occurs or until something else distracts you or you fall asleep from exhaustion.

There is usually no specific goal for worry, no sense of what you are trying to accomplish by worrying. Analyzing, planning, and problem solving all have goals and clear steps to take, and because of this professionals can help you learn to analyze or plan or problem solve more efficiently.

Many people have probably told you, “Don’t worry.” Or they might tell you to do something useful while you worry. They do not tell you about a better way to worry probably because they have not thought about the purpose or the potential value of worry.

What is the purpose of worry?

The purpose of worry is to keep your mind occupied while you let time pass. That is, worry helps you pass the time when you cannot think of anything more useful to do. It is sort of like channel surfing horror movies on TV when you cannot think of anything better to do to occupy your mind as you wait for time to pass.

Worry does not make anything happen. Worry does not keep anything from happening. It does not make things better or worse. Worry does not do anything but act as an annoying distraction that can keep your mind busy while time passes.

Worrying can be a great distraction that exercises your mind and uses up excess energy while you wait, at least until you think of something more useful to do.

What is a better way to worry?

Do not use it to try to make something happen or to stop something from happening. That does not work.

This advice is not about trying to find something more useful to do while you worry; it is about worrying in a better way that is less stressful and less harmful to your body and mind.

Again, a better way to worry is to recognize and accept worry for what it is with awareness, that is, be fully conscious of what you are doing while you are worrying … to pass the time.

If you find this information useful, you can find additional information on my website www. drpaulmalone.com.

Please give a gift to your family and friends and share what you have learned with them.

Thank you for reading this article. I wish you good luck with your Worrying…a better way.

Copyright © 2008 by Dr. Paul Malone